Emo thoughts so early in the morning…

Opening my Plurk today, I see a friend Plurking her rants about something or someone. Then she says she “wishes she was dead.”

This morning’s episode reminded me of a blog post made by my friend, A (yes, that is her nickname), about suicides and losers. (The said blog post was actually made after a similar situation, wherein she talked to a girl who was too heartbroken she wanted to die. Duh.) In the comments section, I even agreed on her stand that those who think of committing suicide are such losers.

Why? Because I don’t get why people think suicide is a solution/escape to their problems. I don’t get why they just want to throw their life away because of some situation that they can overcome in a few weeks’ or months’ time.

Like I told A, it’s not that I didn’t experience some really challenging life situation. I’ve been there, too. When I was in high school, there were times when I felt so alone, when my parents would compare me to my achiever sister, when I would feel so inferior. Being too young to think straight, I also contemplated on ending my life. But I was too afraid of knives and sharp objects. And of pain. And blood, too. And I was afraid to tell God that I just wasted the life He gave me.

I didn’t want to live a wasted life. If I ended it then, I would not have the chance to redeem myself, stand up and move forward, and make things better for me.

If I had continued to commit suicide, I wouldn’t be enjoying the company of such amazing friends, having a job that allows me to nurture my talents, getting married to the person who loves me most, and getting ready to be a mother. As I am enjoying right now.

I would have missed all those happy moments if I did that stupid thing.

I guess I just got to see the bigger picture of life. People should do that, you know. See the bigger picture.

Because if you would just waste the life God gave you, He should’ve given it to someone else who deserves it better.

I guess I just hate emo people. And losers.

Besides, why give up your life on some guy who’s a loser, too?

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